Every January, people make a New Year’s resolution and flock to try out the latest fitness crazes and fads. They purchase lotions, potions and electronic contraptions in order to trim and slim but feed their egos. I personally think the best way to get fit is to employ what I call the ‘Charles Dickens Method’; basically, go on massive walks for a good few hours. Allegedly the writer would take the air daily and spend his walking time reflecting and working on the structures of his novels.
I always find it a tad ironic that people will drive to a gymnasium to maybe then hit the treadmill for twenty minutes. I have often thought that electricity in the gymnasium is in fact powered by the people pounding the machines, cycling and rowing, feeding a ginormous electrical generator to fuel the lights for the establishment.
Another favourable way to slice off the poundage is to dance like a maniac to disco tunes, like Olivia Newton John’s track, Physical. Or perhaps you could don some silver hot pants and boogie around a local roller disco, just like Sir Cliff Richard in the video for Wired for Sound. I advise readers of a nervous disposition to please refrain from viewing this music video nasty. Once seen, never ever forgotten. Please note this was released at the time when punk was storming the establishment!
If you are insistent on picking up a DVD with the latest celebrity for your New Year’s resolution, please – before you do, I wholly recommend this classic, Zsa Zsa Gabor’s, ‘It’s Simple Darlings’. No other fitness guru will attack the workout in the calm and tortoise-slow manner than this famous-for-being-famous star. She even has the assistance of two hunky henchman to help her into positions, in between innuendo-rich dialogue that would not be out-of-place in a Benny Hill script. You may not lose weight through the exercises, but I can guarantee you will with laughter.
Remember, it’s simple darlings!
Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash
